The Passion of the Jaggd

I've been doing a lot of thinking about my job situation, and honestly, I have no good reasons to be at all dissatisfied, and yet…

So I've been here for a little over three months, which as far as real world jobs go, is nothing. However, every other full-time job I've had has only lasted three months, because they’ve all been summer jobs/internships. It's as if my mind expects me to pack up and move on to the next thing. Of course, my stomach says, "If you become poor again and stop eating well, so help me, we're through!" My heart really isn't in this job, so it would probably be happier elsewhere. And my spleen really couldn’t care less about any of this.

I have a mental list of pros and cons with regards to my job. I wasn't surprised to discover that there are a hell of a lot more pros than cons… flexible hours, casual work environment, intelligent co-workers, a salary on which I can live comfortably in NYC, lots of little perks… etc. Then there's this huge con: I don't really care about what I do. There, I said it.

Now, I'm not going to go on some 2000 word rant about how people who are in the business of making money are evil, and I really want to work for a non-profit. I don't believe that. There are plenty of evil people in the non-profit sector, but they're generally not capitalist evil, they're other kinds of evil… and the hedge fund manager I [indirectly] work for (who probably pulls in a few hundred million a year) is a brilliant, admirable guy, who is privately funding some remarkably altruistic projects. Plus, I've already worked for a few non-profit organizations, and I didn't feel especially good about what I did for them either.

I've reached a few possible conclusions:

1. I have simply never had a job which has engaged my passions. While this allows for the possibility that such a job exists, I'm quite skeptical. Regardless, there is hope that I could potentially find satisfaction with my employment.



2. I am not a "job" person. I will never be fulfilled by what I do in the workplace, so I will have to use my spare time to engage my passions, and trudge thorough the days at the office in order to pay the bills.



3. I am a self-indulgent overthinker, and I should be thankful that I've had the kind of opportunities that are probably not available to 75% of the population of this country. Most people have passions, but it seems like very few are fortunate enough to be able to devote their days to them.
   

All this thinking hasn't resulted in any epiphanies, nor do I expect one to arrive. So don't worry about me taking any brash action or making stupid decisions because I had a vision of Siddhartha in my chicken soup, telling me to rid myself of worldly attachments. Sid and Lao, I love you dudes, but you never lived in NYC.

And if you don't know much about Siddhartha or Laozi, I would recommend reading about them. Though in all likelihood they never existed, their purported existence has inspired some beautiful ideas about humanity and spirituality.

Workplace Audio Entertainment

I'm not a huge fan of internet radio, most of the stations are no better than FM radio... it's all about greasing palms for airtime and irritating commericals. But when I get bored with my iPod selections, I listen to SomaFM. The "Indie Pop Rocks" station is quite accessible, and a really good way to discover new music, and if you're feeling a bit more adventurous, hit up "Groove Salad".

It's commercial-free, the connection is pretty dependable, and you can listen to it with any player that can handle streaming content (e.g. iTunes, Windows Media Player, Winamp, etc.) I know I sound like an infomercial, but I want to support these guys because I really admire what they're doing. In true indie style, they're essentially running a radio station out of a basement without any funding.

thirteen senses... unlucky

Lack of Context = Hilarious

Because you probably need this kind of thing as much as I do... Funny writing taken out of context is even funnier, so I present to you this week's installment of Text Lacking Context.

Chipmunks do not wear sweater dresses emblazoned with the initial of their given name, they do not wear matching caps, and they certainly do not mingle with human children that are inexplicably the same size they are. What do chipmunks do? They steal seeds and nuts and hide them for their own selfish consumption. Seeds are baby trees, so basically a chipmunk is an H2-driving murderer who hates God. A great swath of heavenly fire is the preferred extermination technique. - José Lourenço [McSweeney's]

Incredibly offensive if you are a woman, hence pretty damn funny to me:

If you're female and you don't posess prodigal, Einsteinian caliber intelligence that would propel the cause of humanity forward, and, if you don't relish the idea of being alone, then . . . throw every last dollar you have at your physical appearance. - anonymous poster [obviously]

So obscure... the whole story is hilarious, but I'll leave it up to your imagination and/or googling skills:

Apparently, he used to have three nipple hairs on his right nipple. I don’t know why his fiancé keeps a running count of his bodily hair, but she noticed that he was one shy that night. And, she confronted him about it. “What happened to the third nipple hair?” Dumfounded by the question, he said. “Oh, it fell out.” That answer apparently didn’t ring true, and she just flipped out and accused him of cheating on her. Finally, he said, “You want the truth, my supervisor pulled it out at work today!” And, that probably didn’t sound right, either, [though that was how it actually happenned.] - anonymous poster

Hindsight

I found out that I do remember how to speak Spanish, but that it may take a drink or two to remind me of that fact. So I was speaking Spanish with a native speaker at the after-after-party, but it didn't seem like an entirely cohesive conversation to me, but I guess that wasn't the case. I don't recall the content of the conversation, but it was slightly argumentative, as this guy is one of those "I have an opinion about everything, and can't restrain that fact if my BAC is higher than .001" kind of guys. I was never one to put together a cohesive statement at four in the morning in my nativelanguagee, so to do so in a foreign language is quite an accomplishment. I'm sure I dropped some Italian words into my sentences though, because I can longer keep those languages completely separate in my mind. I wonder why the various tenses were the first thing to go from my language memory, is this the case for most people? Why is it easier to remember vocab than conjugation for example? And why in the hell were we speaking Spanish at four in the morning at a random club on the west side?

I also found out that it was probably not the best decision to bust out my dance moves in the company of co-workers. They were astounded that a mild-mannered kid like me has some skillz and now they want me to demonstrate for everyone else in the department. It reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Elaine stupidly tried to start up the dance floor at the holiday party with her spastic kicking dance style, and then everyone knew what a terrible dancer she was, so will clearly become the butt of jokes when she is in the company of co-workers and there is music. I think the same thing will happen to me (except that they'd be earnestly encouraging me.) Dancing must be my superpower… next time I should be more careful of exposing it; with great power comes great responsibility. Hmm, that doesn't translate very well... Con mucho poder viene mucho responsabilidad. Does that even make sense?

Glad I Didn't End Up At This Job

This article is really interesting and entertaining, even if you aren't planning on buying a car, which I'm obviously not, seeing as I live in NYC. Be forewarned, it's really long, and you will probably want to read the whole thing.

Confessions of a Car Salesman

Deep Thoughts

Retro goodness: when SNL was funny
Those thoughts really are deep.

Albums Revisited

I've managed to procure several of the albums I listed earlier, so if you are looking for something new, I'll give you the rundown. Here is the list from before with notes about which I have now. iTunes proved unnecessary, Steve Jobs deserves a kick in the junk for the level of self-righteousness in his commencement speech at Stanford, even if it was inspiring.

1. Mike Doughty - Haughty Melodic or Skittish/Rockity Roll [got both]
2. Phoenix - Alphabetical [got it]
3. Herbaliser - Blow Your Headphones [got different album: Very Mercenary]
4. Nightmares On Wax - Carboot Soul [not yet]
5. The Decemberists - Picaresque or Her Majesty [got the former, and another: Castaways and Cutouts]

I'm one of those weirdos who really like Doughty's scratchy voice and irreverent lyrics. Contrary to some opinions, I think he has come up with some really solid stuff since going solo [from Soul Coughing]. Rockity Roll is definitely my favorite set. It's quite sparse [vocals, acoustic guitar, and synth beats,] and really highlights the intricacies of the vocals. Haughty Melodic is much more poppy as there's a full band. Unfortunately one of the better songs on the album, "Tremendous Brunettes", is slaughtered by Dave Matthews who also sings on the track and sticks in his standard "hey, hey, hey" a few times, which pisses me off royally. It's funny that this song is a topic of discussion here given the comments to the post below ["Picky."] Tremendous Brunettes indeed.

The Phoenix album is really just basic electro-pop at its core, but with a hint of disco, a dash of R&B, and a twist of goofy French accents. It's the kind of funky pop that is fun to listen to, and it must be cool, since they don't get any radio play. I just like it because it's the type of music you can use for both chilling and dancing.

The Herbaliser is just straight up dope stuff, but I knew that before I got this album. 'Nuf said.

I do like the Decemberists, though I suspect they will be one of those alterna-pop hipster bands that will fade out quickly. They are reasonably popular at the moment, which generally spells trouble for that type of band, because they often flip out and rebel against their popularity by producing a craptastic follow-up. What I really like about their albums is the kind of linear story-telling some albums have. It's not a blatant plot or anything, but the tracks have a distinct progression which doesn't work as well when taken out of order. This is a quality I love discovering in albums, and this is the reason I'm kind of a full-album snob. I usually avoid having just a handful of songs from an album. It's kind of an all or nothing deal for me. A recent discussion suggested this was a gender thing, but I think it's just a matter of personal preference. If you see musicians as artists though, it's only logical that you have to have the whole album, otherwise it's just an unfinished installation. Even if you have all the better pieces at hand, you just aren't getting the whole experience.