Fickle

I seem to have settled in to a relatively stagnant state these days. I suppose I’ve achieved that sort of comfortable life I yearned for in the days when this blog began. But since when are we as humans ever happy?

The answer, as I vaguely recall from some psychology class, is for a few brief moments after we get what we desire. And the amount of time we achieve happiness is proportional to the magnitude of the desire met. A bit thirsty? Drink a glass of water, and you’ll experience a mild happiness for perhaps a few minutes. Jobless? Getting an offer should have you feeling great for a couple weeks. There was a study involving people who play the lottery. When asked about the happiness winning the lottery would bring them, people expected they would feel ecstatic, and that these positive feelings would linger for years. Of course, as it turns out, actual lottery winners experience joy for less than a month, not to mention all the negative effects, which they hadn’t even considered.

So although our general level of happiness does fluctuate in accordance with significant events in our lives, we always tend to return to some median state. Not only that, but this median state is influenced by genetics, such that some people are essentially pre-disposed to be happier than others. All of this is fairly intuitive when you stop to consider it logically, but since we forget about logic so much, people tend to have differing expectations. We expect our achievements to bring us lasting satisfaction. “If only I had ________, I’d be happy.” Fill in the blank with anything: something you can buy, something intangible perhaps, even your wildest fantasy… A soda, a car, a house, fame, love, a firmer ass. Ultimately, it will not bring you infinite happiness.

Such is the problem with endorphins and other nice hormones which make us feel good. Nothing we can do will make them stick around for very long. Of course, this is also why drugs are addictive, and why people make a hobby of jumping out of airplanes, and why everything is always about sex.

This is also why fairy tales exist… Because in our lives, there is no such thing as living happily ever after. You can marry Prince Charming, and live happily for a few months, but even assuming he does nothing wrong as a husband, the happiness will fade. Combine that with the realization that his feet smell and he doesn’t share your passion for Meg Ryan movies, and it’s no wonder so many marriages end in divorce.

On the other hand, suicide occurs very rarely, so there must be something keeping us here, right? So I’m sure my next post will cast things in a more hopeful light.

Now, don’t get me wrong. This isn’t about me. I’m not a cynic, I am pretty happy, and I enjoy making other people feel good as well. This is just an unfortunate fact of life that is interesting to explore.

I guessed at some of the details of these purported scientific studies, but for all intents and purposes, I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about.